Summary: A photographer and his /her assistant enter the stable and begin to take a photo of Mary , Joseph and the baby Jesus. Before the photograph is taken, a procession of people interrupt, and crowd out the holy family, and eventually the real person, that Christmas is all about, is sadly obliterated from view.
Style: Light-hearted. Duration: 10min
Actors: Large cast.
Characters & props
Photographer and assistant
Mary, Joseph and baby
Innkeeper/wife/cow
Angel
Shepherds/lamb
Wise men
Carol singers
Santa Claus/his wife Mary Christmas/Rudolph.
A Christmas cracker /Fairy /Plum pudding
Widow Twanky
Television Guide
Script
(Photographer & Assistant enter)
Photographer: Ah yes, here we are! Once more I come to paint with light. Where is the little bambino? Ah yes, such a lovely leetle one. Now where shall we put you all. What about here. Ah benissimo ! Right, this will be a quick shot, look directly at the camera, and say' JEEEEEEEES-US'.
Innkeeper & wife…Excuse us, is it all right with you if we squeeze onto the photograph too, after all this stable does belong to us. We'd like our pet cow on, too, if you don't mind. Thank you ! Could you MOOOOOOVE over a little please for us. Are you fresian in here? Would either of you like a jersey to put on?
Photographer: Right look directly at the camera, and say' JEEEEEEEES-US'.
Angel: That's going to be a super photo, (super natural if I'm allowed on) You see, it's obvious that there's one thing missing. All good Christmas pictures have angels on them! I won't wait in the wings forever. May I…?
Photographer: Yes, I'm sure I'll get you in, move in a little. Everyone say, JEEEEEEEEEEES-US.
Shepherds & lamb: whoa, hold on a sec. You can't leave us out! We've followed this angel all the way here to the City of David to visit the new born king, and it would be nice to take a photo, as a souvenir, back with us, otherwise folks might not believe our story.
Photographer: Now can we get on with the photograph? Say JEEEEEEEEEEES-US.
Photographer's assistant; Just a second: we have a MAGI problem on our hands; some wise men from the east want to know if they can be on the photograph too, but when I told them there was no room for their camels, they’ve taken the hump! So can the camels come in too?
Photographer: NOW can we get on with the photograph? Say JEEEEEEEEEEES-US!
Carol singers: (CAROL SINGERS ENTER AND STAND IN FRONT OF THE PHOTOGRAPHER AND SING) We'll sing another carol if you don’t let us on the photograph too!”
Photographer: OK …….(losing his patience) Say JEEEEEEEEEEES-US.
Santa Claus, his wife Mary Christmas/Rudolph: Come along Mary, this is my wife Mary Christmas, and this is Rudolph who's got a bit of a cold tonight!”
Photographer: Oh deer!
(A Christmas cracker /Fairy/A plum pudding arrive together:)
The Christmas Fairy: This cracker will explode if she's not on. The plum pudding is so fat, she'll be huffed if you say she can't be on. And there's no way I'm going to sit on top of that tree for his photograph this year cos’ it was too uncomfortable last year. So we would all like to be on please.
Christmas presents arrive: We're the Christmas gifts- all present and correct.
Photographer: At long last…NOW THAT’S PERFECT. Hold it there, say Jeeeeee-us. That’s what I call Christmas.
Widow Twanky: You can't possibly have a Christmas without me! Not without Widow Twanky!
Television Guide: And you won't know what's on TV this festive season without me!
Photographer: Right, is everyone ready now? Say……
Member of congregation: We can’t see Jesus now!
Assistant: Where IS the bambino anyway? Where has the baby gone? Stay still, don't move. Can anyone see him?
Joseph: Ssssssh!
Mary: You’ll wake him up in a minute with all your noise.
(All tiptoe away.)
Song: Oh poor little Jesus
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© Copyright Sheila Hamil, all rights reserved. The script may not be reproduced, translated or copied in any medium, including books, CDs and on the Internet, without written permission of the author.
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