Alien

By Paul Clark

Summary

After Pete hears a sermon on "living as aliens in this world", an alien turns up who wants to take the scripture literally.

Scripture

Romans 12:1-2, Ephesians 2:19, 1 Peter 1:13-25, 1 Peter 2:9-12

Characters

Cyborg  
Steve  
Pete

Script

(Scene: Pete and Steve's flat. Pete is watching TV, eating Tim Tams, waiting for Steve to come home from Church. Suddenly there is Alien music, flashing lights and Cyborg enters, dressed as an Alien. Pete isn't phased at all.)
Cyborg: (Music, lights, Cyborg enters very dramatically) Greetings, Earthling.
Pete: (Pete is unfazed, still watching TV) Hi Steve, I was wondering when you'd get home from church. I've been home for an hour. What the heck have you been up to?
Cyborg: (In an Alien voice) Do not call me Steve. I have been Born Again on this Planet as Cyborg (Alien Salute).
Pete: (Pete looks over at Steve and laughs) What on earth have you been up to?
Cyborg: Not on earth. I belong to another planet, another kingdom where the Redeemer reigns supreme (Forms sign of the cross with fingers)
Pete: Oh I get it, this is about the sermon we heard tonight from 1 Peter. 'Live your lives as strangers, as Aliens, on this planet.' Please - I don't think we were supposed to take things so literally. What did you say your name was again?
Cyborg: I am Cyborg, I come in Peace.
Pete: Cyborg! (Laughing) What an original name! Sounds like something from a kid's book. Why didn't you think up a real Alien name like Bgwij or Androponicus?
Cyborg: (Starting to feel made fun of) When I was chosen by The Redeemer, who fought for me and lost his own blood, when I was chosen, I was Born Again in this new body, an imperishable body and given the new name Cyborg.
Pete: It's not going to work you know. No-one is going to want to become a Christian because of your sissy space outfit. They're just going to think you're a weirdo.
Cyborg: I've come to show love to the human race, deep love.
Pete: Sure sure, you'll scare the crap out of everyone.
Cyborg: (Suddenly reacting, fingers in ears) Warning, warning, danger, danger, swear word, obscene language, must filter from mind.
Pete: What the heck's got into you Steve, all I said was crap!
Cyborg: (Even worse) Help, must stay holy, must stay holy, be pure, think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts.
Pete: Oh I get it, be holy as your Heavenly Father is holy. Bit corny. (Suddenly realises) Now I really do get it. This is your latest attempt to get a girl friend (laughing again). It's a bit too 'try hard' don't you think? As if the girls are going to go for this. Shiny suit, boof head. I suppose it does take away from what you normally look like (continues to laugh).
Cyborg: Leave Cyborg alone, I come in peace to love deeply, from the appendix.
Pete: That's heart you moron. Of all the flat mates in the world I had to end up with this one! Here Steve, Cyborg, whatever you want to be called, have a Tim Tam, sit down and watch the rest of this movie with me.
Cyborg: (Looking at Tim Tam, hand out defensively) Must not be tempted. Do not conform to the evil desires of this world. Self control.
Pete: Oh come on Steve, I don't think evil desires of this world stretch as far as Tim Tams. (Plays with him, flashing the Tim Tam closer and closer, Cyborg cowers. Eventually get sick of this, throws The Tim Tam at Cyborg and sits down). I hope if aliens really do come we can scare them off with Tim Tams.
Cyborg: (Jumps out of the way of the Tim Tam, regains his composure) My name is Cyborg, I came in peace to love you deeply, but you have mocked me ever since I entered this evil planet. Prepare to be hurt ... a lot. (Puts out his arm in Darth Vader style, strangling him from a distance, grunts as if really concentrating.)
Pete: (Looking bored, turns to face him) What are you doing now?
Cyborg: I am using the action of my mind to strangle you. (keeps trying, nothing happens, gives up. Looks downcast)
Pete: Steve I think this little game's gone on long enough. We had an excellent sermon tonight, and 1 Peter has got a lot in it, But I think you are taking it just a tad too literally. Look I'll admit, sometimes I take being a Christian for granted. I get your point, we need to be a little more radical, a bit more like strangers on this planet, maybe even Aliens. OK I'll turn this movie off, and I'll go easy on the Tim Tams. I need to work on my holiness and show more love to people, be more like Christ. After all we are here today, gone tomorrow. But you must admit you've gone too far this time, you've gone a little stupid! (Cyborg, who has been looking downcast, suddenly runs out crying). Fair dinkum, he's a little sensitive tonight. (Yelling) And take that stupid costume off!
Steve: (Enters) What costume?
Pete: (Surprised) Boy that was quick.
Steve: Man, you should have came to McDonalds with us after the service, I think I've cracked it with Donna, man, she's a babe (showing a female figure with his hands)
Pete: (Pete is disgusted and slaps Steve on the hand) That's disgusting mate.
Steve: What's got into you?
Pete: More like what's got into you? What happened about all that holiness stuff? Pure thoughts, real love, not lust . I knew that suit was just a chick magnet!
Steve: Suit? What suit?
Pete: Your stupid Alien outfit, you know (mimic) Cyborg.
Steve: I don't know what you're talking about. After church me and the gang went to McDonalds, I've only just got back. You can ring any one of them to find out.
Pete: (Looking worried) You mean. (Looks around, feels throat, faints).

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© Paul Clark 2002. All rights reserved. For use at not for profit events only. You can use the drama for free but please e-mail and let me know…   paul&bec@dovenetq.net.au   and announce that I wrote it. Also I ask that if you perform this drama and it really hits the spot, it really clicks with what the Spirit is doing, you might send me a small donation to live off. Check out my web site for more stuff  www.dovenetq.net.au/~paul&bec